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Thursday, September 18, 2008

TT2: 13 Ways to Say "I Do"


13 Ways to Say "I Do"

After three years of studying and the application process, I have just received news that I'm officially a marriage celebrant... In honour of this, I've found 13 ways to exchange vows.

1... "Woof" (actually, these are bow-vows, exchanged by dogs)

2.... I, (groom), call upon the persons here present to witness that I take you, (bride) to be my lawful wife.

3... Through all of the uncertainties and trials of the present and future, I promise to be faithful to you and love you. I promise to guide and protect you, as long as we both shall live.

4... You are my best friend for life. I pledge to honour, encourage, and support you through our walk together. When our way becomes difficult, I promise to stand by you and uplift you, so that through our union we can accomplish more than we could alone. I promise to work at our love and always make you a priority in my life. With every beat of my heart, I will love you. This is my solemn vow.

5... As freely, (name), as Spirit inspires my life, I join my life with yours. Wherever you go, I will go; whatever you face, I will face. For good or ill, in happiness or sadness, come riches or poverty, I take you as my (husband/wife), and will give myself to no other.

6... The Eskimo Love Song goes... You are my husband, My feet shall run because of you, My feet dance because of you, My heart shall beat because of you, My eyes see because of you, My mind thinks because of you, And I shall love because of you.

7... Julia Roberts promised Lyle Lovett "I, Julia, in the presence of God and these witnesses, take you, Lyle, to be my husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, until death parts us, and I pledge you my faithfulness." (Marion, Indiana; June 27, 1993)

8... Kurt Cobain and Courtney Love's vows ended with the words EIA IHO NO, KA MALUHIA, O NA LANI, ME OUKOU A PAU (The peace and serenity of the heavens be with you all). And so it is ... Amen ... and ALOHA! (Waikiki, Hawaii; February 24, 1992)

9... I imagine this is what Chris Evert might say to Greg Norman: I Chris, take you, Sharky to be my lawfully wedded husband and chief tennis doubles partner, for when you win and when you miss that hole-in-one. I promise to love, honor, and cherish you, to return your serves and do my best not to foot fault.

10... Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston vowed to "...split the difference on the thermostat."

11... I'm busting for a couple to let me conduct the service using the Dr. Suess wedding vows. They start with me saying: "Will you answer me right now, These questions, as your wedding vow?" and the groom answering "Yes, I will answer right now, Your questions as my wedding vow." And so on..... for another 8 minutes!

12... Excerpt of Elvis Presley and Priscilla Beaulieu's vows (Las Vegas, Nevada; May 1, 1967): I, Elvis, take thee, Priscilla, to be my wedded wife, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish.

13... and finally, the vows that my husband and I exchanged in Las Vegas (yes, in front of Elvis):

Him ~~~
It only took one night to get stuck on you, and now my wish came true, you big hunka hunka burnin' love! I thought you were nothin' but a hound dog, cryin' all the time, but now I know you're my teddy bear 'cause tigers play too rough and lions ain't the kind you love enough. So kiss me quick and love me tender for I can't help falling in love with you.
Me ~~~
It took a hard headed woman to make me king of the whole wide world. I thought you were the devil in disguise but you turned out to be my puppet on a string. I used to live in the hotel down the end of lonely street but now it's viva las vegas 'cause I need your love tonight.

Post script: Yes, I do weddings!





5 comments:

Unknown said...

This is a really cute list. Thanks for sharing!

Ms. Jess said...

A fellow T13 here. Congratulations on becoming a marriage celebrant. And thanks for the chuckles.

Anonymous said...

Heh heh heh...I love this list! :)

I didn't play this week, but wanted to comment as well as give a big thanks for the EC advertisement over at my place.

Have a lovely weekend!

Suzie Ridler said...

I just wanted to comment on the ghost thing, I don't usually get online during the weekend but wanted to write.

I can understand your worries about the ghost. I recommend writing a petition to the Goddess (or whatever diety feels right) through your spirit guide. Write that there is a person trapped in your home who can't make it to the other side. Write down the exact date he/she needs to be saved by. Then say it aloud by candlelight and release this issue. You can burn the paper or whatever feels right. Try going around the house speaking to it too and explain the situation. Tell them you are sending help through your guide, angels, the divine... and that it is time to go home.

I hope that helps. Let me know OK? Poor soul. Good for you for caring and helping. This will make a difference.

Tink said...

I like the Eskimo lovesong! :) The vows by you and your hubby are great!
Thanks for visiting my TT.